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- Finding the time to put any sort of blog together these days is difficult. More difficult is finding words that don't sound absurd in my head. As I mentioned awhile back, the Lenten reflections pamphlet that I contributed to has been posted at Faith and Family Live. Knowing that what you've written is being read by a large amount of people all of a sudden makes writing more daunting. Nonetheless, I am confident that God alone will determine what happens with these words, even if it means people are gagging.
- I love Sundays for so many reasons. This past week I found yet another. Ross took MK to nursery where she pranced in happily and came to meet me in the sanctuary. Ross put his arm around me and we both looked down at the ever-growing belly. As many post-first-baby pregnancies go, I get busy with life and Mary Kate and popping prilosec. On Sundays, it's just daddy and mama and Jesus and baby number two, without the distraction of big (loud) sister. Ross put his hand on his newest babe and I smiled, finally taking a minute to breathe a sigh of thanksgiving for this baby.
- Taking a big left turn, what I do NOT love during Mass is "helicopter head." My definition of this is when a baby is crying and 30 people turn around to confirm the obvious. Having been the red-faced mama of a crying baby, none of those faces were calming. I'd venture to say that even if you turn around to give a sympathetic smile, your time might be better spent facing forward and saying a prayer for that mama. My two cents: unless you are turning around to hand that lady a starbucks gift card to get her through the day, keep your eyes forward.
- Whew. Now I feel better. On to things that matter more, much more. My heart is heavy lately with the burdens being carried by so many. As I sit in the comfort of my home, there is baby being held by a nun downtown whose mama has full-blown AIDS. Will that mama see her little girl grow up? There is another mama a few hours east who is enduring a very difficult post-chemo day. I pray for her comfort and complete healing. There are close friends who would give their left arms to become mamas. Oh Lord fill their homes with sweet babies. My amazing brother has a broken heart and a breaking spirit. Oh that he would find a faith that reminds him that God truly comforts the brokenhearted. Just lots of reasons to sit down, close my eyes, and sit in trust that Jesus has got all of this.
- Yesterday, our MOPS group heard an amazing couple talk about marriage. Quoting often from Love and Respect, it was basically a dart between my eyes. I know that a woman I admire endorses it highly and I even HAVE the danged book. Time to open it. I love my husband intensely. And I would tell you all day long that I respect him immensely. But I can see that having been self-sufficient for 10+ years before we met, I formed some habits that need tweaking. At the end of the day I need to show him what I feel inside- that he is a strong, loyal, successful, handsome man of God who provides for this family in every single way.
- Mary Kate must have read my post about this age being my favorite because she has decided to make a fool out of me. She has been a pill this week and is making me crazy with whining and throwing fits. But today as she hurt herself during one of her fits, I sat down to hold her and blot the blood on her lip, I spotted an eye tooth popping through. So I'm hopeful that my angel baby returns in time for our uber busy April with lots of travel and routine changes.
- I have read many inspiring women who say that God always gives them just enough grace to get through a day. Yesterday, Ross was working major husband over-time by installing our new sink and disposal. Knowing MK would want to be under the sink "helping" dad, I realized I'd be working overtime too. After a rough post-nap time at home, we headed for the park. I was exhausted, feeling like 3 more hours of solo parenting might do me in. I literally had tears in my eyes as we left the park to go eat dinner, all of a sudden not believing those ladies. I did not feel that grace flowing in, giving me that last needed bit of energy to get through the next hours. But, big surprise, we got to a favorite restaurant with outdoor patio where MK could roam. She ate a bowl of chicken-chili like it was her job and clapped and sang. She was the perfect toddler child. Unexpectedly, our friend Karen came to meet us toward the end and gave Mary Kate her favorite thing- an audience. Driving home, I couldn't believe it had been more than 3 hours since I'd doubted that God would supply me with a few more drops of energy. But supply me He did. One day I'll stop being surprised by the gift of his grace!