Monday, December 13, 2010

Dear. Sweet. Precious. Daughter.

In the words of Uncle Jesse, "Have merrrrrcy."

It is 5:45 pm. Your dad will not be home until after midnight and is gone again tomorrow night.  We HAVE to work together. Mom has given you rice cereal, nursed you, put orajel on your baby gums, given you tylenol, and has now resorted to Baby Einstein- WHICH ISN'T WORKING?! Darling, why are you the one baby on the planet earth who will not watch and listen to the soothing lullabies of Mozart?? Remember how I said that I kind of love the "Louisa Kate" brand of fire-cracker-ness? I lied. I am so sorry for lying. Tonight, and until your dad is back in action, I need you not to be a fire-cracker. Tonight, I need you to be malleable, compliant, easy-going (can't even keep a straight face writing 'easy-going' about you, m'love). But could you please throw your mother a bone here. I cannot nurse you any longer or I might cry. And I really don't want to pour that 2nd glass of wine. I know walking you outside would do the trick but kiddo, it's 30 degrees. And your face is chapped to hades and back so that would likely make you cry more later. I am so sorry your mouth hurts and you miss your dad and you just don't feel good. I have a lot of compassion for you, truly. It's just that my head hurts and I miss your dad and that makes it hard to come up with new ways to distract you from your fussiness. So, like I said, Have Mercy on your mama.

I need you to go from feeling like this....

to feeling all happy about your double chin-ness.

thanks. love mom.

P.S. you are sooo going to bed early. after which I am sooo pouring that next glass of wine.


  1. POUR the second glass of wine, and have it for me, i need it...but as i am incubating what i only hope to be a non-fireball little boy i cannot indulge. :)

  2. oh, and ps - i don't judge on when this glass will be consumed. :)

  3. I hope you had that 2nd glass of wine, girl! : )

  4. Wish I lived in ATL and wold come give you a break! I don't mind some fire-cracking and we could have a glass together!!!