Thoughts on Thirty

Today was magical. The only image I can use is that of an astronaut in space, looking at the earth. I felt like I could step far enough back to really see my life. I was too far back to see our tiny home and our black leather sofas. I couldn't see the piles of clothes my husband would pay me $100 to hang up or the crazy low ceilings darkening my home. What I could see, it was beautiful.

I woke up to see my husband walking in with our baby, already with a bottle, holding a plate with a kashi waffle and a diet cherry dr. pepper. I saw my girl smile at me and my husband lay her next to me. I saw the clock and the first number was a miraculous 7!

A little while later I took the girl and the boy on a walk and saw our neighborhood. Instead of seeing the tee-niney houses, I saw sweet elderly person, one after another, raking or mulching or walking, each saying "Good morning" or "look how sweet." I saw our graying puppy prance around the neighborhood, smartly resisting the urge to take MK and I down as he chased a squirrel.

I came home and put the babe down to nap easily and saw birthday presents from my sister and parents. The generosity and love in those packages is unmatched. From mom and dad, there was a gift for something just for me,  non-mommy, non-wife goals. From Katie, a blank check (so dumb :) to buy a fun necklace and a new book, an indulgence, again, just for me.

A bit later I got an unexpected phone call from an old friend from the Catholic Center. Larry Dempsey is in his 70's and took me under his grandfatherly wing years ago. He came to our wedding and despite his daughter's cancer and his grandson's recent injuries, he remembered to call me on my birthday. My heart was so full with the love sent from Watkinsville this morning.

Shortly thereafter, a precious girlfriend called to say happy birthday and my four favorite words: "let's go to lunch." A slice and a salad later, Mk and I returned home to see our favorite man of the house. My amazing husband was having a rough morning and decided that giving me my birthday present would cheer him up. I was happy to selflessly oblige and am now the owner of a special, special jewel on my right ring finger. Having had a semi-serious family budget talk just a day before, I was floored by this generosity and his insistence that I have it. In the battle between wishing I didn't want material things and still being a girly girl at times, girly girl wins today. And my husband is a rockstar. Just sayin.'

I spent MK's afternoon nap reading my new book by the pool and soaking up one of the many perks of working at home. She woke up a few hours later and we shared some time outside together, me getting some Vitamin D and she eating some watermelon in the sunshine. At one point I looked at her and felt that outer body experience- that feeling of "how did I get so lucky." Then I looked down and she tee-tee'd all over her exercauser and the concrete. I laughed out loud at my life and how quickly God will bring a girl back down to earth.

Things only got better with a Nuevo Loredo b-day dinner. Our girl loves mexican food as much as we do and we took full advantage of the relative ease of life with only one little babe by an impromtu drink at the Six Feet Under rooftop. I told Ross that I just feel so full and so satisfied with our life. He choked on his last sip of Bohemia.

The night ended with me rocking our girl, her pot belly (and mine) hanging out in all it's glory. Her little left hand, holding her ear and her little legs kicking in her striped pajama pants made the day.

Really though, the biggest blessing of today was a hiatus from the dissatisfaction and discontent that can plague a rough day sometimes. It was a day that did not feel the least bit monotonous ( I could handle the monotony of lunch time gifts in tiny boxes though!)  or tedious. It was a day where God blessed me with the ability to find immense joy watching my daughter devour piece after piece of watermelon and where looking into my husband's eyes showed me all my dreams coming true. Every day I am blessed. Today I am extra blessed because I felt that in every ounce of my being.

So far, 30 is perfect. Texts and FB messages from best friends, work friends, long-ago friends and calls from the ones I love most made me feel so loved. Impractial and heartfelt gifts made me feel so special. From this view, away from dog-hair covered floors, dirty bottles and piles of laundry, my life is pretty close to perfect.

My prayer is that this decade is full of brothers and sisters for Mary Kate, biological and maybe even adopted. I pray that my faith explodes and our home is one where prayer is shared daily and lived every minute. I pray that on my 40th birthday, I am more in love with my husband than I can even fathom today (which is a helluva lot). I pray that our children grow to be compassionate, aware, joyous and loving people. I pray that my children see a mom who is commited to her physical, spiritual and emotional health. I pray that my husband thinks I'm hot 10 years from now. I pray for his success, personal and professional and for that success to afford us more babies or the ability to help more babies through mission work or philanthropic work. But above all else, I pray that 10 years from now, I wake up to my husband and my child(ren) who are healthy, faith-filled people who love the old lady in their lives.

Pure joy on this 30th birthday!!