7 Quick Takes Friday on a Saturday because I am erasing Friday from this week.

--- 1 ---

With so much free time on my hands now, I may be blowing up the blogosphere. I hate to bore the pants off of anyone, but I also know that writing will keep me from going totally insane. It's a balance, though. I don't want this space to be my emotional wastebucket, spewing complaints about life, nor do I want it to get nauseating with declarations of all the blessings. I think what I want is to go back after 15 weeks and a healthy baby and see how God used this time to make me more of who I am supposed to become. Here's hoping.

--- 2 ---

Roo Roo. Roo is my sister (Katie). At a young age, I had a love for all things Winnie the Pooh and when she was born, I nicknamed her Roo and have seldom called her anything else. She had planned to be with us this weekend for Ross to go on a lake trip and help me get organized for baby. Instead, a week ago today, she was packing her car and dropping everything to come be with us. It was such a relief to have my sister here. I knew I could call and bark orders about important things like what color hairbow MK needed and to remind her to not even breathe aloud when babe is napping. She is my sister and has 22 years worth of experience with my irrational needs. There is no way to thank her (other than by letting her leave Thursday- that was all the thanks she needed!) for being here at the exact moment that I needed her. She loves me and my girl and even shows love to poor Mack. We may have tried to kill each other more than a few hundred times in life but I couldn't live without her.

Roo with a tiny Mary Kate

--- 3 ---

A few days ago, I knew Ross was on his way home. So I grabbed my makeup bag and quickly attempted a blind makeover. You know, because this whole sofa scene is uber sexy. He walked in and said "babe, you're wearing makeup!" I interpreted this as "whoa, so nice to see you not looking like a hag." Then I went to the restroom and realized the correct interpretation was more like "hi honey, bozo the clown wears less rouge." He confirmed interpretation 2 when I asked. All I can say is that this man has come a looong way from when we met and had zero filter. I also need a table top mirror if anyone is making a run to target. Thanks.

--- 4 ---

After a few days of feeling healthy , Ross and I made a gametime decision that he should continue his plans at the lake with some wonderful guys. With plenty of help in place and after a good bit of prayer on both our parts, it seemed doable. I am no saint for sending my husband on a guy's trip during this time. What I am is someone who knows those guys, and knows what my husband needs, especially not knowing what the coming weeks hold. Hearing his voice often throughout the day has confirmed that we made the right choice. I am so nurtured and encouraged by the women in my life and am thankful that he is getting the same from some stellar guys. It's a good reminder that the menfolk need their cups filled as much as their more emotional counterparts. Plus, I have my eye on some shoes that I want in exchange for my wifely sweetness! Selfless I am not.

Ross in his happy place (though this time with less baby and more beer)

and me with what I hope will be the happy place for my feet. (I'm sure I'm too neurotic to actually buy them but thinking about them on unswollen, unpregnant feet is nice!)

--- 5 ---

I am scared as living hell that this baby will come early and we will be spending our days in the NICU and facing big health hurdles. I am also scared as hell of 14 more weeks of the current routine. Thankfully, I'm more afraid of the former.

--- 6 ---

Yesterday was tough tough. Mary Kate had a terrible day and I was convinced that she is really starting to struggle with this set up. Having me near her but not able to care for her is awful on both of us. Naptime, bedtime, and middle of the night-time have been heinous. My level-headed husband reminded me that her day yesterday was probably more due to her exhaustion than adjustment issues but I am still sad to see her struggling. Last night was the worst night home, as she cried and cried for mama while Marita put her down. I finally couldn't take it anymore and went in the room. She threw herself on my chest and clutched my arms and I cried feeling for the first time what it is like to have to choose between the needs of your children. Unable to deny MK's emotional needs, I was sacrificing new baby's needs for me to stay in bed. I pray and pray that I have the courage to know Mary Kate is being held and loved ultimately by Jesus and that His mother is mothering her when I cannot. It is just so counter-intuitive to not run to my girl. And yesterday I ran to her too often and I can only hope that it wasn't at the expense of progressing any further with new babe.

--- 7 ---

Someone please tell me that mind-rotting is reversible. Because the bad timing of all this mess is that tv is on summer hiatus and I am watching a whole lot of trash. Big Fat American Gypsy, Say yes to the dress, all kinds of reality mind numbing. And my girl too- 4 bajillion 1 minute You Tube clips of ballons and old macdonald and babies crying (yes, weird obsession). Good thing her brother or sister is ensuring we can never afford to send her to Harvard anyway.  Oh, almost forgot. My one hiatus from terrible tv is Grace Patton. Please scroll to her "Simon Says" section. She will make you wet your pants. With 2 children in abour 4 minutes and a husband in OB residency, she is tired and crazy and hilarious. You won't be sorry.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!