May 28, 2009
Dislaimer, if you are under 18, any of you 5 readers of this blog, do not continue reading. 2nd disclaimer- this ain't a feel good entry.
Now~Today started gloriously. I slept in a little bit but still managed to drag myself to the gym. Then at 1.5 miles when I thought my knees were breaking and nearly stopped, I got a burst of energy and ran the remaining 3.5. I left the gym feeling accomplished and ready to start the Grady day.
Then it happened. I am on my way to work when I struggle to read a nasty little bumper sticker. At first I thought it said "Just say NO to sex with prostitutes." But upon riding the rear of this car to get a closer look, I about fainted. It said, " Just say no to sex with pro-lifers."
Seriously, what the living heck?!! OH MY GOSH! Not surprisingly, I pulled up next to the girl in the heinous green jeep and glared at her and glared some more. I did everything to show her with my eyes what I thought of her stupid sticker and her stupider opinions. But of course she was gabbing on the stupid phone probably about stupid opinions and she didn't see me. A few honks from the people behind me later, I removed my glare and decided maybe I should pray for this stupid girl. I didn't get very far in my prayer. Instead, I spent the drive to work thinking about this.
Obviously, she is implying through her stupid bumper sticker that sex with pro-choicers is fine and that as long as one is having sex with someone who will willingly abort an unwanted child, the sex is then a good idea. I don't even know where to start.
First, I should say that in high school, I proudly stood along Abercorn Street holding signs that said "Abortion Kills" in every pro-life rally I could find. Whether or not I was passionate about abortion or just about having something to be fired up about I don't know. (Do we see the seeds of social work planted at tender ages?!) I do know that I was against abortion in any case. And in the interest of full disclosure, that stance did change some in the years of child abuse work. I will admit that I still find some gray area. I have seen children impregnated by their fathers and babies left in trashcans. I have seen burns and bruises and sadistic treatment. I have looked into the eyes of children who were unwanted and tortured because of it. I have looked into the eyes of little girls who did not want to bear their father's child. So, am I ready to say that abortion is wrong in every, single, instance? Not quite yet. But as I learn to trust God teensy bits more, I am getting there.
As R and I embark on this next phase of our life, I am struck with the idea that some forms of family planning do risk breakthrough ovulation which, if using some forms of birth control, result in the 'sloughing off' (how disgusting is that word) of a fertilized egg (aka BABY.) I was not prepared for how strongly this would affect me and how quickly my thoughts are changing on the pro-life issue. I have always been against abortion as a form of birth control but am starting to feel ill at the idea of any child being aborted, sloughed off, whatever. So, with this new issue of family planning and children on my heart, I was punched in the stomach by that stupid bumper sticker.
Okay, let's break it down. Turned around, the stupid bumber sticker says "Just say yes to sex with pro-choicers." I am honing in on the word choice. I believe strongly in a woman's right to choose...what happens to HER. And the way I see it, any woman has a few different opportunities to choose before we get to the baby issue. She might choose to NOT have sex. (Lord forbid we eliminate the risk of AIDS, a pregnancy, a nasty ole STD). She might choose to use a form of birth control (preferably one that doesn't involve any sloughing off). She might choose to accept the idea that for most of the population, first comes sex, then comes babies. So, there are some ways to exercise our rights to choose, for ourselves.
But once we make the choice to have sex, we must accept the possibility of pregnancy. And that's where the choice should end. It's no longer just your body. It's 2 bodies. And if we MADE the choice to have sex, we then accept the results.
This is actually not an area I am comfortable discussing. The world is a brutal place for unwanted children. It is a brutal place for women who have no choice in whether or not they have sex. It is a brutal place for young girls who don't even know the word rape because it is such a part of the worlds in which they live. So the abortion issue is a complex one for some people. But for others, it should be a lot less complex. For those of us with access to education, healthcare, the latest studies on behavior modification, it shouldn't be so hard. We have lots of CHOICES we have the liberties to make~lots of them that don't lead to pregnancy. Maybe we shouldn't be so greedy and expect that if we make, dare I say, the wrong choice, we should then IMPOSE our choice on someone who didn't ask to be brought into this debate.
So to the girl in the stupid, green jeep cherokee, maybe you should make the choice to not have sex or JUST have sex with one partner or to prevent pregnancy any number of ways (again, none that slough). Why should a child's life end because of your CHOICES?
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Okay. I'm done folks.